My emotions always surprise me.  When I first decided to move all I could do was cry.  I cried every time I told people for the first few days and cried every time I thought about it.  Then I went through a dry spell.  Maybe it stopped feeling real because the decision had been made but I had a long wait ahead of me before the move actually came.  

As the time for me to leave comes closer I'm still not crazy emotional, but have moments of overwhelming sadness.  Before you think to yourself "Beth is backing out", I must say that I feel such peace that my decision will not be changing.  I'm just kind of amused by the things that have brought out this emotion.  I would have expected the sad moments to come in quiet moments when I was alone and thinking too much.  Not during normal, everyday activities.  Sitting in a truck with my best friend, driving through NV in a silent, comfortable moment I felt that sadness.  Running around my friends basement being rowdy & playing a made up game with my nephew, I felt sad again.  Sitting at a Ryan Shupe concert last night listening to a VERY upbeat song I cried.  These little moments are perfect examples of why leaving Utah will be so hard.  Those moments aren't necessarily sad moments or anything spectacular, they're fairly common moments that make up my life.  It's in those moments that I realize how much Utah has become my home.  Some may be confused at the fear and sadness I feel about moving "home".  To you I may be moving home but to me I'm leaving my home.  I feel safe and happy in MD but Utah is my home and leaving will be much harder then I would have expected.

Random random thoughts...