"Who is this person and what did you do with Beth?"

That there subject is almost an exact quote (i took my last name out) said by Brian as we talked on the phone this evening. I was quite excited by that response to the stories I told him about the last few days and I agree. Who is this person and WHAT did I do with Beth?!

I've gone a little crazy lately. A few days ago I was all sorts of grown up and had a really really good open conversation with a friend about some things that were causing a strain on our friendship. A conversation of that kind would, in the past, leave me crying in a bathroom because I was having an anxiety attack but not this time. It helps that I was having the conversation with a really good friend that I feel I can be quite honest with but it also showed me that I'm growing up a little bit.

Fast forward two days and you'll find me at the door of an apartment in my new apartment complex waiting to go to church. I haven't moved in yet, but yesterday when I went to find out where my new ward meets I met someone kind enough to let me tag along with her to church so that she could show me where it was. Most times in my life things like this cause me great anxiety but today I felt at peace. I went to church, was introduced to a few people, introduced myself to a few people and then went to Sacrament meeting. As I sat there singing hymns (it was a musical Sacrament meeting) I felt completely at peace and felt so strongly that I was exactly where I am supposed to be right now. I don't know what is to come, I don't think that my life is going to be perfect after I move but I do feel like I am where I am supposed to be. I feel ready for change and saw that even more as I went off to Sunday School by myself, sat with someone I met in Sacrament meeting and then went to Relief Society where I introduced myself to a few more people. After church I stood in the hall and met my Bishop along with a few others and left feeling confident. I am proud of myself. This step was a long time coming. I know that it all is because I prayed about where I should be for the next stage in my life and that this was the answer.

I want so badly to just take control of my life. I don't want to feel like everything is spinning out of control anymore. I have much hope for this next stage and I know that it will be what I make it. There will be difficult times, low times, moments of insecurity or fear but there will also be new adventures with new people and a better attitude. So bring on the change because with change comes new opportunities!

This photo is of some amazing cloud cover Rachel Brian & I saw as we sat outside late one night a few weeks ago. As I was taking the picture Brian said that that cloud cover felt like a promise or a sign to him that good things were coming. (correct me if I'm wrong about that...it was along those lines I believe) When I think of the things that have happened over the last couple of weeks, and not only in my life, I would have to say I agree.